Man Crush [man kruhsh] - noun
A man having extreme admiration for another man, as though he wants to be him.
Over the past few years I have struggled with the concept of the man crush. At first I was uncomfortable with it because I too thought it had some kind of sexual connotation, and I can't think of anything I'd rather avoid than giving Kevin Youkilis a hug. The more I thought about it the more I realized that I've always had man crushes, any serious sports fan has, its just that the feeling of admiration and loyalty never had a good term to describe it. I've had a strong man crush since 2007, but it wasn't until a special athlete caught my attention (I'll get to him soon) this year that I decided to fully embrace the man crush.
Just so you know, the man crush I've had for the past few years that left me conflicted is for Jacoby Ellsbury. He is a Pac-10 guy, came up through the Red Sox farm system, and came through big time as a rookie in the 2007 World Series. I could just as easily have attached myself to Grady Sizemore, but he doesn't play for the Red Sox and after recent images have come to light I'd rather avoid saying aloud that I have a man crush on Sizemore (I won't post them here, but www.deadspin.com has more than you would want to see of Grady, unless you are a woman) and further the negative association.
So now we come to the catalyst. This man has forced me to examine some of my ideas and borderline homicidal prejudices against his national team, and finally embrace the man crush. I'm talking about Alexandre Pato. I'm sure that serious football fans out there are upset that it took me this long to notice him, but he plays in Serie A and I'm a big Premier League fan. I also have an unnatural dislike for Italian football, the league and the national team, so it wasn't until the Champions League started in 2009 that I would get to see him in action. I also started using ESPN360 and found out that he is only 20 years old, and has been playing at club level since he was 17! I think my head would explode if I was 20 and one of the best players in the world, that or grow a Jesus beard and completely lose my sanity.
He even makes the guns look like a good idea.Pato has caused me to embrace the man crush, even more so than Jacoby, because I have every reason to hate him. I absolutely cannot stand Brazil (the national team, not the country/people) and when they mailed in their final game against France in the 2006 World Cup my disgust only grew. It also doesn't help that the media is always falling all over itself to proclaim Brazil as the favorites for everything, and to make it worse I grew up with the Ronaldo era Brazil that made them seem like the most arrogant collection of players possible. Add in the post 1994 bandwagon that rode strong through 2006, their knack for eliminating my teams (England 2002, Netherlands 1998 after the happiest moment of my life), and I'm sure you can see why I hate them. Despite everything Pato has caused me to no longer completely dismissed Brazilians, and allowed myself to wish that Berlusconi would lose his mind and think swapping him for Berbatov is a good idea.
So thanks to Pato I am now comfortable with my man crushes. I still hate Brazil, and I'm really going to hate AC Milan for a two game stretch in February, but I'll be not-so-secretly wishing I could make a deal with Satan and trade places.
